So...today happened....

That's right...today happened and I was floored! First off I was watching the "House" episode from Monday and it was about this African president that was in the hospital for treatment and the doctors found out he was a tyrant, killing people in his country through genocide. Well the doctors didn't care if he died or lived and had a twinge of what's right or wrong. In the end one of the doctors does end up killing the president because he thought he was doing what's right. As I was contemplating morals and ethics and trying in my own mind to find the perfect answer, my thoughts just went to a question I saw on a shirt that said "Who would Jesus bomb?". Is that where I stand as a Christian? Do I follow Jesus' views on killing and death? I'm all Mennonite on this subject. I believe, in His commandment to us, that God gives us the direction/ability to love everyone and the freedom to not have to judge who deserves to die or live. We just have to love. But what does love look like? Does it look like killing one to save a million,that's what God did. Then I had to answer the question of who would Jesus bomb. I came up with a list! 1) Bad Guys - good guys always kill the bad guys...alas everyone is bad and no one is good... 2) Mosquitos - I thought about this one way too much and ended up wondering if God was ever testing us with Moquitos seeing if we respected His creation enough to not kill 'em.... 3) Satan - this seemed like the winner!!!! If Jesus bombed Satan then that would save a million hearts from brokenness, a world from dying, and His own sadness... Pondering the last thought I concluded that Jesus would bomb no one because he would have done it already....right??? Mind-boggling....I need someone to talk this out with!!! I'm no expert or even novice in ethics and morals. That then brought me to the realization that I'm "regreting" (I also don't believe in regrets because to me in means that I didn't learn anything and boy did I ever learn!!!) not living like Jesus this WHOLE summer. I feel like, just now in the last five days of my time here that I actually trying to live in a way to shine light. This whole summer I was apathetic to the thought of living like Jesus. Complacent and lazy...I even got that on my final evaluation at work....my boss used "headache", I like to think of myself as laid-back, in all reality it was pointing to the fact that I was a slow and lazy housekeeper!!! OK back on point. Tonight on my way to supper I was reinforced in the thought that I'm a Christian through three comments by people. All summer I was having problems with this just making it through a day. I did not think about who I was and where I belonged. Now that I'm reflecting on the summer, these comments helped to strengthen my belief. The comments were in passing and included "she wouldn't want to hear that she's apart of ACMNP", "I'm going to add some bash the Christians if you don't come", and "how could you say that you're a Christian" (in reference to phrase that I'm not a good person...hahahahahahahaha). Of course these comments were more making fun of me then encouraging but to hear those words coming from their mouths just reminded me that I believe God loves me....I needed to hear those words....well....I didn't actually hear those words....but from God I did....ummmm.... I was taken aback from these occurrences because they all happened within an hour of each other and it was after I was contemplating morals and ethics and struggling with the "regret" (I can't think of a better word to use at the moment) of not living a shining life pointing to Jesus this summer. I was reminded that God used me anyway and people saw/see what I stand for even when I fail to be a great example. SO I encourage you out there reading this long crazy random story to find the ways that God shows YOU how much He loves you. I discovered that today it was through a TV show and random comments from people!!!!